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Eight Years Too Long
Feb. 3rd, 2014 12:34 amThis has probably been a long time coming, but I think after that last realization, a few days later in bed, another one came, but in this format:
Don't let an eight year old storm steal your happiness.
Don't let a relationship that ended ruin your happiness.
Don't let a job that makes you upset sometimes ruin your happiness.
Don't let your debt (which is decreasing!) ruin your happiness.
Don't let your accidents scare you and ruin your happiness.
Don't let a friendship that went awry ruin your happiness.
And after each one, it felt like a boost in good feelings jolt me every single time, up until I felt like I had finally let all of that hurt go. It's not complete, but damn if it isn't a huge step in the right direction. I was carrying around so much pain and hurt from all of those things, that it was likely robbing me of my energy and my peace of mind. Not long after that, amazingly, I found it so much easier to concentrate, I felt way less stressed out, and finally, I felt like I could think clearly again. ...but I also became very sleepy since. XD Maybe like my body renewing itself after all that.
Not to mention, with my 31st birthday a little over a month away, it made me think about just where all that has left me, and where I am today. That, and hoping I don't let the rest of my life slip away, ruined by the anxiety and stress I placed upon myself due to all of those situations. Live, learn, and move on.
Not much more to it than that! This one wasn't terribly deep, but I think it broke through a lot of my personal walls.
Don't let an eight year old storm steal your happiness.
Don't let a relationship that ended ruin your happiness.
Don't let a job that makes you upset sometimes ruin your happiness.
Don't let your debt (which is decreasing!) ruin your happiness.
Don't let your accidents scare you and ruin your happiness.
Don't let a friendship that went awry ruin your happiness.
And after each one, it felt like a boost in good feelings jolt me every single time, up until I felt like I had finally let all of that hurt go. It's not complete, but damn if it isn't a huge step in the right direction. I was carrying around so much pain and hurt from all of those things, that it was likely robbing me of my energy and my peace of mind. Not long after that, amazingly, I found it so much easier to concentrate, I felt way less stressed out, and finally, I felt like I could think clearly again. ...but I also became very sleepy since. XD Maybe like my body renewing itself after all that.
Not to mention, with my 31st birthday a little over a month away, it made me think about just where all that has left me, and where I am today. That, and hoping I don't let the rest of my life slip away, ruined by the anxiety and stress I placed upon myself due to all of those situations. Live, learn, and move on.
Not much more to it than that! This one wasn't terribly deep, but I think it broke through a lot of my personal walls.
